The Story of the Small Church

Studies tell us that over half of the churches in America have fewer than 75 people in them.  Since statistics are compiled by averaging mega-churches with small churches, the technical average church size in America is “184 people.”  But the real indicator is the first statistic:  Over half of us are in churches of fewer than 75. 

 

As a pastor’s wife in one of those smaller-than-average churches, where a Sunday crowd that tops 55 people feels like the “Great Awakening,” I am intrigued by the story that these numbers tell because . . . it’s my story.  This is my life.

 

There is a raw fact that is often overlooked in ministry preparation:  Most young people entering the ministry have been prepared for larger works than what they will actually encounter. 

 

Part of that is logistical.  Bible colleges and seminaries often turn to men who are established and well-known nationally when selecting the pastors who will be mentoring their young men through chapel services and revival meetings.  Naturally, radio stations, magazines, books, blogs, and broad ministry exposure allow certain speakers to hold influence over large populations of people.  Having established themselves with good testimonies as well as wisdom in public speaking and managerial skills, they are no doubt fitted for the job of preparing the next generation of preachers.  There is nothing wrong with this at all.  Yet, because colleges typically draw from larger ministries, the story of the small church tends to be overlooked in ministry preparation.  Pastors of small churches find themselves with shelves of leftover college lecture notes on such topics as “How to Keep Unity Among Your Staff,” and “The Pastor and His Retirement Fund, ”  when they’d really like to know how to have meaningful devotions after three hours of sleep, or how to locate a septic tank that was buried before the health department kept records.   

 

Secondly, summer internships and other similar programs are almost always held at larger churches, since exceptionally small churches rarely have the budget to host interns, group evangelistic teams, or musical groups.  In fact, most of these small churches are not really equipped to hire an assistant or even a secretary.  The economy has not kept up with the prosperity of the 1980’s, and many of the teenagers (like myself) who grew up in churches with thriving youth groups and multiple layers of leadership are now surprised to be working in churches where the toilet paper and windex are brought in by volunteers. 

 

And so . . . here we are, most of us serving in smaller churches than we grew up in, smaller churches than we prepared for, smaller churches than we ever even imagined existed.   

 

Here are four things to consider about exceptionally small churches, from the perspective of a pastor’s wife: 

 

1.  There are many reasons why churches are small. 

 

When I went to my grandma’s funeral six years ago, I was reunited with a lady from my childhood church.  She and I had not seen each other in at least 30 years, and we enjoyed getting caught up with each other.  When she asked what my husband and I do for a living, I answered, “We live in Illinois, and my husband is the pastor of a small country church.”  It wasn’t meant as an excuse; it’s just our reality.  She quickly corrected me:  “But it doesn’t have to be small!  You can grow!”  I remember wondering if she thought we preferred for our church to stay small.  Didn’t she realize that most pastors pray for new members, and work zealously to that end?  It wasn’t really worth a tangled discussion at my grandma’s funeral, so I just agreed with a smile.  

 

Churches are small for lots of reasons, and if we accept that fact, our ministry can become a joy and not a frustration.  We pray for growth, we work tirelessly to reach others for Christ, we expend ourselves and our resources almost daily for our ministry, we go to bed exhausted and get up before we are really rested, we pay for small expenses without reimbursement, and we are small.  I’m OK with that.  My husband doesn’t need a frustrated wife to add to his heavy load.  God uses small churches.  My job is just to make sure that I am a “clean vessel,” set aside for His use, so that He can use our little church in His big kingdom. 

 

2.  There are opportunities in small churches. 

 

I’m convinced that criticism is burden, turned on its head.  What you see first, when you walk into our church, is your job staring back at you.  Do you notice that our music is a little off-key, or that I’m clearly not an expert on the organ?  Those are the observations of musicians, and we’ve got room for those with that gift to aid in our worship service.  Is it the need for renovation that strikes you most—our dated pews, or our plumbing problems in the restrooms?  Maybe you have the gift of helps.  Do you notice the bevy of little van kids, runny noses and hair falling out of place, making paper airplanes out of their Sunday school papers in the front row?  Maybe you have a spot in your pew for one of them.  And maybe it will be your smile they remember, thirty years from now, when they try to imagine what Jesus looks like.

 

Sometimes people will tell us, “You need to get more young families into this church!”   We agree wholeheartedly!   What a blessing you can be at welcoming new people to your home for dessert, or just adding a friendly face to our crowd.   Show your support for a small church by joining them in membership, and then lend a hand!  There’s plenty of room for your gifts here.  We’re not quite as polished as the guys on TV, who have video editors to take out the coughing and the mistakes.  But if you get sick and have to be hospitalized—my husband will come see you.  That TV preacher, as nice as he is, and as much as he probably appreciates your monthly gift, will not be there.  Come help us encourage others. 

 

When Joshua was born five years ago, I hated to schedule my faithful ladies to watch him in the nursery every Sunday night.  These were the same ladies who already did so much—from teaching Sunday school and singing in the choir, to working in our ladies’ missionary circle each month and helping to clean the church and serve for special events.  Since it was just our own child on Sunday evenings, we started scheduling our other children to take turns in the nursery for Sunday nights so that I could hear the preaching.  We like to laugh about the night Nathan got fired from the job, though.  As a six-year-old, his career in nursery work was cut short when he got so absorbed reading  Dora the Explorer  that he failed to noticed Josh making a quick escape—all the way out of the door and down the front aisle of the church!  Yes, we have a job for you here. 

 

3.  Every skill counts.

 

I’m thankful for every single thing anyone ever taught my husband and me—from making homemade bread to sewing, from laying tile to hanging drywall.  My husband just finished repairing our church lawn mower, and now he is headed out the door to drive a school bus.  Some of those lessons were learned when we were growing up; some of them were learned under other mentors; and some of them have been learned right here, when lay people with specific expertise taught us how to do these things. 

 

Discipleship and delegation are crucial in ministry, but small churches still find themselves with a pretty large to-do list for the pastor—and especially in aging congregations.  Do we wait until we have more converts and helpers before we paint the bathrooms, or do we just go ahead and get ‘er done? 

 

Anyone who is called into ministry ought to become a student of every life skill and ministry skill he can find.  Rather than complaining that all the churches are asking for a pastor’s wife who can play the piano—get a book.  Even simple chords with a melody line make a big difference in congregational singing and keep Sunday mornings from sounding like a monastery. 

 

4.  God provides for small churches too. 

              

We don’t have to be intimidated by the small church budget.  Ruth said to Naomi, “Thy God shall be my God.”  When I see a church with a massive gymnasium, Christian school, or updated auditorium, I say, “I have that God too!”  He pays my water bill.  He keeps our van running.  He gave my kids money to go to camp this year, and jobs for our twins to save up for a missions trip to Haiti this fall. 

 

I am afraid that sometimes we try to “self-medicate” when it comes to meeting our own needs, instead of laying our burden out before the Lord and letting Him provide.  About five years ago, God led us to give up our major credit cards.  It was a personal decision, and not based on a conviction that everyone else has to do that.  In fact, some people find that they actually make money using credit cards.  But for us, we just felt God wanted us to use our money toward saving for future emergencies rather than constantly trying to pay past emergencies off.   And God has not failed to pay for our needs. 

 

One week we had some extra expenses to pay, and we had what we jokingly call the “week of 35.”  We had $35 left that week for groceries.  As you can imagine, with four teenagers and two other children, it was going to take some real planning!  Amazingly, we had three different loads of food given to us that Monday, by people who spontaneously called and said they “happened” to be cleaning out cupboards and needed to get rid of extra food!  No one knew we were going to try to scrimp by on eggs, rice, black beans, and milk that week.  But God knew, and He provided food I wouldn’t even have indulged in on a “good” week!  Our pantry was suddenly overflowing.  One lady gave us at least three or four bags of cappuccino mix. Who buys gallons of cappuccino mix when they can barely afford butter?  That’s just how God works!

                                 

We prayed for a full-time bus job for my husband since 2007.  He worked many hours substitute driving and even accepting a challenging position for one school year, driving to the alternative school (for kids who have been expelled from the local district).  The hours were very long and taxing, and the spiritual challenges were very immense, since the boys on the bus were involved with pornography and lewd behavior and language.  We earnestly prayed for a local job with the children in our own district—although it seemed out of reach.  There were two other drivers ahead of Jason in seniority, and they both seemed to enjoy their positions.  Last summer, one of them moved unexpectedly.  The other one accepted a position elsewhere and, without warning, resigned his job.  Jason got the job we had prayed for!  He drives past the church twice a day, past his own deer blind in the fall, and all the while he marvels at the amazing creation of our gorgeous farmland right here on Rural Route Three.   That’s how God works! 

 

I openly share this with you because you have that God too.  Those of you who are considering ministry:  Don’t be afraid of the small church, the church plant, or the mission field where funds can be tight.  God can use you to bring healing to a hurting ministry, to bring reviving growth to a stagnant ministry, and to make that small field your field, for the glory of God.   And those of you who are looking for a church to attend, set aside your checklists.  We don’t have a big youth group or an orchestra or a Christian school.  We just have jobs, places to serve for those who are willing to pitch in, lend a hand, and store up eternal rewards.   

The Interview

An interesting article came my way, and I’ll share it with you before I blog: 

 

 Former New York City mayor is pledging to spend $50 million this year to push gun control, the New York Times reports. For this and other deeds (such as taking on obesity and smoking), Bloomberg believes he's going to heaven.

“I am telling you if there is a God, when I get to heaven I’m not stopping to be interviewed. I am heading straight in. I have earned my place in heaven. It’s not even close,” Bloomberg told the Times.  Here's the full context of Bloomberg's heaven quotation:

Mr. Bloomberg was introspective as he spoke, and seemed both restless and wistful. When he sat down for the interview, it was a few days before his 50th college reunion. His mortality has started dawning on him, at 72. And he admitted he was a bit taken aback by how many of his former classmates had been appearing in the “in memoriam” pages of his school newsletter. But if he senses that he may not have as much time left as he would like, he has little doubt about what would await him at a Judgment Day. Pointing to his work on gun safety, obesity and smoking cessation, he said with a grin: “I am telling you if there is a God, when I get to heaven I’m not stopping to be interviewed. I am heading straight in. I have earned my place in heaven. It’s not even close.”

 

 
Mr. Bloomberg’s Republican opponents might unkindly respond to his tongue-in-cheek with their own sarcastic charge that it’s the gun control and Pepsi-legislation that’s actually keeping him out of heaven.  And finally, Mr. Bloomberg and his opponents would have something in common:  They could be wrong together. 

 

This isn’t about obesity, or guns, or giving to charity.  For that matter it's not even about going to church, getting baptized, or working as a missionary in Tibet for six decades.  Because salvation isn’t about what we do.  It’s about what Christ already did. 

 

This week marks a time of reflection for almost everyone, religious and otherwise.  Whether you are struggling with doubts about eternal life, or enjoying a super-sized dose of Bloomberg confidence, the reality of Christ’s horrible suffering leaves us with one lingering question:  Why? 

 

Why, if we are not really that bad at all, did Jesus have to be stripped down to nothing and scourged with glass-embedded whips, until his appearance was no longer human?  Why did a crushed piece of matzo bread resemble His body so accurately that He could emphatically tell his disciples at the last supper, “This is my body, given for you”? 

 

Why the mock trial, the blindfold, the games of brutal soldiers, the liars at the trial, and a surprised murderer released?  Why the thorns?

 

Why the “cup” of suffering, despite His tearful pleas?  Why the agony of a six-hour dying, a public humiliation, and a weeping mother sharing space at foot of the cross with soldiers who gambled for his robe?

 

We like to inject ourselves into the story here as angels, watching someone else’s tragedy unfold, shaking our heads at the injustice of it all.  What if I had been there?  What part would I have played?  I want to identify with the angels, but honesty is brutal. 

 

I am Judas, loving this world and its treasures at a cost I can’t even measure until it’s too late to remedy; selling my Savior for the price of a slave. 

 

I am Peter, denying our friendship lest I be forced to fellowship in His sufferings; and then hiding in regret, profound sorrow, and failure.

I am Pilate, fearing people more than loving truth; trying to appease a frenzied crowd with a scourging--yet calling Him “King of the Jews” on the sign above His head and desperately trying to wash my hands of “that Man.”    

 

I am Barabbas. It was my sin that should have been punished that afternoon.  Instead, the crowds who gathered at my execution watched Jesus die in my place, for my sin.  He “Who knew no sin” was made sin for me.    

 

I am Mary Magdalene, confused and broken by grief, focusing on a tomb and a stolen body; failing to remember the promises, never expecting to hear Jesus say my name again.   

 

I am Thomas, looking for a sign, hunting for nail prints because my faith is too weak to accept Christ’s own words. 

 No, Mr. Bloomberg:  There really is a God.  And when I face Him, I will not be skipping past “the interview” due to my own merits. 

 

Because there is no interview. 
  

The blood of Jesus is the only thing that can satisfy the justice of God.  For those who choose to accept Jesus' death as their own payment for sin and call upon Him to save them, heaven is already sealed as their future, eternal home.  Sadly, for those who would try to substitute this finished work of Christ with their meager efforts and righteousness, no discussion is needed, no lengthy explanations about how life was spent.  They will face an eternity of paying a debt that can never be fully paid, and needlessly suffering torment that was already experienced for them at the cross.   

 

“Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.  But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities:  the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.  All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all . . . Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief; when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand.”  (Isaiah 53:4-6, 10)

“For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life, through Jesus Christ our Lord.”  (Romans 6:23)

“But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on name.”  (John 1:12)

 

Have you ever stopped depending on your own merits to secure heaven, and simply received the free gift of eternal life through Jesus Christ?

 

An Artist's Perspective

A couple of weeks ago, I blogged about the differences between right-brain dominance and left-brain dominance.   I asked our 17-year-old daughter, Jessica, to write about her experiences using art and color schemes to help her retain information, especially with her music.  She explains here:

 

Last summer, as I was practicing my piano arrangement for church the next day, I was already dreading it.  As I sat there reviewing my past episodes of messing up songs in front of the whole church, I began to get frustrated.  It didn’t make any sense to me:  I could play the song perfectly the night before, only to bomb it during church.  Of course, there was the explanation of nerves, but I knew that it wasn’t just that.  I had been calm the last time I played, only to watch the song slip through my fingers.  And then there was the explanation of not practicing enough.  But I knew my song and could play it perfectly the night before.  I know I’m not a Mozart.  Music isn’t one of my passions, and I’m not one of the more gifted musicians in my family. 

 

But as I sat on the piano bench, I was mad at myself for messing up and was more determined than ever to get it right this time.   It was then, as I stared at my music, I saw something that I had always seen but never realized.  I knew that my brain saw all the notes on the piano and on the page in colors.  “C” was always yellow; “A” was always red; “D” was always teal, and so on.  Since the notes were colors, the chords were a combination of colors.  And since letters are colors in my brain also, the song’s title gave the song an overall “color” as well. 

 

But as I looked at my music this time, I realized my brain was seeing something more.  The notes on the page had become a type of “timeline” that consisted of pictures, different colors than the usual note colors, and feelings that held the song together in my memory.  When I played in front of people, though, the timeline disappeared.  I had to fight to almost sight-read most of the notes as if I had only seen the song a couple of times. 

 

Now that I know my memory works this way, I can play better in front of people.  I just have to work the colors and pictures into my mind and remember things like, “It goes purple down here . . .”, or “It turns gold on this part . . .”   My brain goes through the door of color in its way of memorization and music.

 

 

Pretty amazing!!  God, Who created our minds with such creativity and detail, is not boring or redundant!  I appreciated Jessica taking time to let us peek into her mind for a minute.   Maybe Jessica’s understanding of how her creative, artistic mind works will help someone else to understand their own learning style and find success!

Is Your Child Left-Brained or Right-Brained?

Quite a few years ago, our family had an interesting conversation at our breakfast table with a guest staying at our house.  We were discussing the nature of the brain, dreams, and how people think.  I said that I have conversations in my dreams, and our guest immediately disputed me:  “No one dreams words!  People only dream images!”  He was pretty adamant.   I remember thinking, “Is this guy actually going to argue with me about my own dreams??  I don’t even think Daniel and Nebuchadnezzar had this conversation!”

                  

I don’t mean to shake up anyone’s world, but it’s really true:  My dreams have words in them.  In fact, I think words all the time.  It’s a characteristic of being extremely left-brained.  I can’t find my way out of a rest area without guided assistance, but I can write a blog while driving down the road and just put it on paper when I get home.   I think words, with images sprinkled in.   

 

Unfortunately, most of us forget that others don’t think exactly like we do.  Like the guest who vehemently denied that I could have a conversation with the bad guy in my nightmare, most of us think that everyone else is thinking in the same patterns we are.  This can produce an obstacle to good education—and especially in homeschooling, where the educational environment sometimes consists of only one teacher for thirteen years! 

 

As a homeschool mom, I am intrigued by how the mind works.  I have six kids who are uniquely different, with various talents and different skill sets.  For many years in the past, educators measured children almost exclusively by left-brain dominant skills (reading, talking, memorizing, test-taking, and categorizing).  I am sad to think of how many children felt “stupid” growing up, although they were probably more gifted than the teachers who made them feel that way.  By understanding how our children’s minds work, we are better able to help them retain information and use their skills for the Lord. 

 

I have enjoyed researching this subject (especially with the book The Gift of Dyslexia, by Ronald Davis), although none of us are really “experts.”  The brain is far more complex than what any of us can summarize in a book.  At risk of being dangerously over-simplistic on this issue, let me explain right/left brain dominance this way:  The left hemisphere of the brain is the speech region of the mind.  The right-hemisphere of the brain is the image region.  The left hemisphere tends to accumulate facts through language, and then organize its information in a linear fashion (think:  “on paper”), in what usually appears at first glance to be a symmetrical, orderly fashion.  The right hemisphere tends to cull information by "sweeping" from the world around us, using spacial reasoning and all five senses, in what often appears random and haphazard.  Most of us show dominance one way or the other—although we all use both sides.  The better our hemispheres interact, the more we are able to access and develop our stored information.  If you can clap your hands together without falling over, you are using both hemispheres.  Extreme use of the right-hemisphere, at the expense of the left-hemisphere, often results in dyslexia or dysgraphia.  Extreme use of the left-brain results in . . . whatever I am:  a lost mother, wandering for days in the Walmart parking lot because I was so busy “mental blogging” that I picked up ZERO visual clues on my way into the store, and thus have no idea where my van is parked.  Thankfully, we can exercise our brains and develop stronger synapses between the hemispheres. 

 

It’s good to know which side dominates our children’s brains so that we can help them learn.  Those of us who are dominantly left-brained (a common trait of many elementary teachers, just by nature of the demands of the profession) often overlook the clues into how right-brained kids think.  Is it possible that your child’s grades are not telling you the whole story? 

*Does your creative, artistic child feel “stupid” because he struggles with reading? 

*Are you using strictly left-brain skills (writing, copying, memorizing) to teach him new information, instead of accessing his memory center through the right hemisphere (actions, songs, movement, and tactile exercises that stimulate nerve endings in the skin)?  

*Are you punishing bad grades with more left-brain solutions (“Copy those math facts 50 times.  And no playing outside until you have learned them!”) instead of delving into the root cause of the struggle?

*Does your child constantly depend on non-specific words (such as “thing” and “stuff”), gestures, and onomatopoeia (sound effect words)—not out of laziness, but just because it just takes so long for his brain to finally spit out the correct word?

*Are you focusing exclusively on the “what” questions (“What is the capital of China?  What is the square root of 49?”) and overlooking the “why” questions (“Why does grass feel wet on a summer morning?”)? 

Left-brained kids compile data; right-brained kids are intrigued with processes.  The left-brained guy says, “There’s a word for that!”  The right-brained guy says, “There’s an app for that—and I created it.”   We left-brained folks like to remember all the rules, but it was our right-brained friends who discovered them in the first place. 

 

How can we decipher whether our kids are predominantly right or left-brained?  While I’m not a “purist” when it comes to video games (we own a Wii), it helps to turn off the video games, phones, and TV regularly.  Those devices tend to direct the brain into certain veins of thought, rather than letting the child create and solve his own dilemmas. 

*What do your kids daydream about when it’s quiet? 

*When they are staring out the car window, what is floating around in their heads:  words, songs, numbers, stories, images--or a combination of all those things?

*Where does your child tend to be correct in his hunches?  Is he a good guesser of distance, weight, and time (right brain), or is he a good guesser of spelling and pronunciation (left brain)? 

*Can you ask your child to organize a drawer (left-brain), or is it better to leave that drawer alone and ask him to figure out why the DVD player isn’t working (right brain)?

*Does your child organize his possessions symmetrically (left-brained), or artistically (right-brained)?  (Or not at all?  J )   

*Does your child do a good job reproducing and reciting information someone already created (left-brained) or does he tend to play the piano by ear and create new, wild stories at play time and crazy doodles when he picks up a pencil (right-brained)?

 

Because the brain hemispheres control opposite sides of the body, hand dominance can offer another clue-- although it is more complicated than just the question, “Are you lefty or righty?”  Some people are left-hand dominant for both gross (large) motion as well as fine (small) motion.  Other people switch dominance, depending on whether they are writing (fine motor) or swinging a bat (gross motor).  Our son bats with his right hand and throws with his left; writes with his left hand but holds his fork with his right.  Another quality to look for is eye and foot dominance.  A right-handed child can show left-eye dominance (which complicates gun sighting for several members of our family!), or vice-versa.  A left-handed child can use his right foot as his starter foot for running, and vice versa.  (*To find foot dominance, have the child stand with his eyes closed.  Give a gentle shove from the back, and whichever foot jumps out first to support him is his dominant foot.)  Those “mix-and-match” kids are just demonstrating that both hemispheres are at work—an excellent quality to have.  Those of us who are 100% single side dominant (eye, foot, and hand) for both gross and fine motor skills might be relying pretty heavily on one hemisphere at the expense of the other. 

 

In my next blog, my daughter Jessica will be sharing some things she learned about using art to help her mind retain information, and understanding the complexity of her right-side dominant brain. 

 

How Does God View Fasting?

(My husband preached a message last year on fasting, and here are some thoughts from that message.)

 

As we reflect at this time of year on the importance of Jesus’ death and resurrection for all of us, it is common for there to be much attention focused on the practice of fasting.  While it is an important subject, it is also a commonly misunderstood one.  I hope that these thoughts from Jason’s message will help my readers to understand even better how God views fasting.    

 

1.  Fasting is Biblical. 

 

Jesus taught it.  In fact, He never said, “If ye fast . . .”, but rather, “When ye fast.”  (Matt. 6:16)  Fasting is a way to show our desperation to God.  It is Biblical to fast when seeking God’s will in a particular situation or when praying over a very serious need.  Fasting shows God our earnestness in asking our request, and it demonstrates the high priority we place on God’s help over even our personal comfort.   David talked about seeking God “more than my necessary food.”  Fasting focuses our desires on the Lord and deliberately sets aside our natural hunger for physical comfort.  The suffering of fasting is not about showing God our righteousness, but about showing God our need and appealing to Him on that basis.   

 

2.  Fasting is never public. 

 

While it is common nowadays to announce these decisions to others, we are commanded just the opposite.  Jesus said, “Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance:  for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast.  Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.”  (Matthew 6:16)

 

Sometimes churches will ask members to consider fasting for a serious need that has arisen—maybe a child facing life-threatening surgery, or a missionary being persecuted in a Muslim country.  Church members make those decisions privately, though, and do not add their names to some list on the bulletin board or announce it to others.  In fact, when we fast, we are supposed to do our best to look like we’re not fasting!  We should not make it obvious to everyone that we are skipping lunch today or avoiding sugar for spiritual reasons.   Fasting is strictly between a Christian and God.

 

3. Fasting should not be reserved for just one season of the year. 

 

Our needs and desperate situations do not just occur before Easter, although that is when fasting tends to get the most publicity.  In fact, our entire lives are filled with desperate needs, which God often uses to shift our attention from the glitter of this world and onto Himself.  Christians ought to be fasting periodically throughout their entire lives, as the Holy Spirit leads them to. 

 

4.  Fasting is not about giving up sin. 

 

Jesus wants to free us from the bondage of sin permanently in our lives, through His power in our hearts.  Fasting from cigarettes or cursing for six weeks before Easter—and then resuming the habit on Easter Sunday, is a bitter irony.  Jesus conquered the power of death and the power of sin by rising from the dead.  If we have sins that Jesus has pointed out to us that He wants to remove from our lives, then surrender to His Holy Spirit is the answer—not a temporary "fast". 

 

5.  Fasting does not earn heaven.

 

The rewards that Jesus referred to in Matthew 6 were not about earning eternal life. Fasting does bring reward—answered prayer, healing of sick, direction in our lives, even rewards to be distributed in heaven to those who were already saved.  But making it to heaven itself is not one of the rewards of fasting. 

 

There are people in heaven who have never fasted.  The thief who died on the cross next to Jesus did not begin thinking spiritually until he was within a few short hours of death—and by then, he was nailed to a cross!  He trusted in Christ, and Jesus promised him, “To day shalt thou be with me in paradise.”  (Luke 23:43).  That thief did not have time on this earth to fast, join a church, do good works, or give money to charity.  He simply trusted in Christ, and heaven was his home.   

 

The way to heaven is the same for you and me.  God did not adjust the terms of heaven for the thief on the cross just because he was confined by nails.  Trusting in Christ is truly the only way to heaven.  Jesus told his disciples, “I am the way, the truth, and the life.  No man cometh unto the Father, but by me.”  (John 14:6)

 

Sadly, there are people who have fasted on this earth who are in torment today.  Hell is full of “good” people who will stand at the judgment and say, “Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name?  and in thy name have cast out devils?  And in thy name done many wonderful works?  And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you:  depart from me, ye that work iniquity.”  (Matthew 7:22 -23).  Why would Jesus call their good works “iniquity”?  Simply:  Because God views human righteousness as “filthy rags.”  (Isaiah 64:6).  Salvation is obtained, “not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy.”  (Titus 3:5).   

 

If you are concerned that you might not be going to heaven when you die, God makes the way clear:  “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”  (Romans 10:13).  Our sin can be forgiven only by “the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world.”  (John 1:29) 

 

Heaven is sinless.  To go there, our sin must be erased.  But we cannot erase our own sin with these futile and feeble attempts at righteousness—impressive works performed by sinful humans, plagued by sinful motives; human accomplishments marbled together with self-righteousness and pride and comparison and apathy toward our Righteous Creator. 

 

“The blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanseth us from all sin.”  (I John 1:7).  Have you stopped trusting in your own righteousness and asked Jesus to cleanse you from your sin? 

 

 

Suitable Helpers

In defiance of the ice and snow storms bearing down on us, we had Little League sign-ups yesterday.  Spring is scheduled to arrive, whether winter agrees or not.  And when it does, you will find Valentin boys in the baseball fields.

When our kids first started playing baseball and softball, we noticed that early players have a complete misunderstanding of their job in the field.  Left-fielders, right-fielders, and center-fielders would notoriously stand in “their spot” and watch balls fly past them—sailing through the air or bouncing past them on the ground.  When coaches and spectators would call out to them, “That was your ball!” the kids would stare back in confusion.  “My ball? But it wasn’t in my spot!” –as though the ball and the glove had to have some sort of magnetic relationship that would ping the baseball directly into the glove, just like it does on the Wii.  It took a few practices (or even seasons . . .) to convince some of those little players that fielding is a running sport.  You go where the ball is.  It rarely (if ever) comes right to you.  

 
As wives, we are defined in the Bible by our mission.  Like a fielder whose job is defined by where he stands in a game, we are defined as “helpmeets” to our husbands.  Modern usage has reduced that to one word, but in the Bible it is actually two words:  “help” and “meet,” or “helper suitable.”  Suitable helper. 

 
Don’t let the broadness of “suitable” be mistaken for ambiguity.  It’s a big field out here, but that’s not meant as an excuse to miss the ball.  It just means that your job involves a lot of running. 

 
Sometimes the baseball is hit high in the air—sailing well over the heads of infielders into a beautiful, predictable arch that gives us fielders lots of time to anticipate its landing and position ourselves.  Those are the easy catches.  Batters hardly have a chance on those. 

 
But sometimes that ball flies crazy.  It might crash into foul territory, out of reach of the third baseman.    We’re supposed to be there—and get him out on the foul.  Sometimes it hits the ground so fast the pitcher misses it—and so does the second baseman.  Bouncing crazily, ricocheting off every rock and dip in the field, it’s like catching a bullet in a pinball machine.  We’re supposed to be there, too, and get the batter out at second.   

 
Every swing takes a different turn.  A tall player gets up to bat, and we all take a step back.  But then he hits it just between the second baseman and the shortstop.  We have to sprint to catch up to the ball and “be there” for that one too. And sometimes the catcher gets wild and overthrows the third baseman.  That’s ours too--get it back into the infield. 

 
In the heat of a July game, it’s tempting to whine about how things are going.  “The other guys keep hitting the ball over our heads!  And my teammates make so many mistakes!”  But you are the fielder, right?  You get every ball.  Stop reading about other ball games, where everything went perfectly well, the hits all landed in mitts, and no one even had to break a sweat.  This is your game, and you are ready for anything.  You are “suitable.” 

 
It doesn’t do any good to complain about where the ball landed.  So you were expecting it to come to your mitt?  But it didn’t.  We have to race after it, even though this isn’t the game we might have thought we were signing up for.  The game has taken a turn from when it first started?  We have to adjust and sprint anyway.   

 

Every game is different.  My game is different from your game.  “Suitable” means you do what it takes to help.  Some husbands need an accountability partner for their drug rehab.  Others need someone who can hold down the fort while he travels on back-to-back business trips.  Wherever the baseball is hit—you catch it.  That’s your job.  After a while this job can begin to seem impossible:  No player is perfect, and this season is all game—no practices. 

 

True.  But have you met our team’s Owner?   

 

Unlike any other owner in baseball, He doesn’t have box seats with air-conditioning and steak dinners, where He and His friends can critique and cheer and celebrate.  This Owner stands in the field with you.  When that baseball is coming at you at 120 miles per hour, he runs with you and helps you stop it.  When it’s 98 degrees outside, and the other fans have gone home, and nothing in the game seems to be going right, He gives you the strength, the speed, and the precision to catch the ball.  Every. Time. 

 

To be honest, some of the baseball games out there intimidate me.  Some of you are locked in marriages that break my heart.  Past mistakes haunt you—from offender registries or DUI mug shots still posted online.  Substance abuse, anger, pornography, mental illness, gambling addictions—the tragedies seem endless.  I have cried and prayed with you, and walked away haunted by your stories.  Lurking beneath the surface, the doubt whispers, “This too?  Can God handle this too?”   

 

But I know our Owner.  He paid an incredible price for this team:  His own life.  For those who have asked Jesus Christ to be their Savior, His promise is not hollow:

 

“According as His divine power hath given unto us

all things that pertain unto life and godliness . . .”  (II Peter 1:3).

 

All things.  It’s all there.  Whatever you and I need to be a “suitable” helper, ready to help our husbands as God wants us to--we’ve got it!  Not in ourselves, by personality or education, but through Jesus.   

 

If your husband is a pastor, with huge pressures on his time, finances, and marriage—you’ve got what you need to be a great pastor’s wife.  If your husband is disabled and needs you to take care of him 24/7—you’ve got what it takes to be a strong, cheerful caregiver.  If your husband has addictions that are tearing apart your family, you have what it takes to be creative and wise in your solutions, to protect yourself and your children without compromising your marriage vows.  If your husband is crippled by emotional handicaps, God has given you everything you need to obey the Biblical command and be a suitable helper. 

 

So, however your game is going, and wherever that ball gets hit—whoever your husband is, and whatever your marriage challenges are:  If you are a Christian, you have everything it takes to be a suitable helper: 

 

Through Jesus.