Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Gift-Giving Principles


This time of year, as we scan the Black Friday ads, we all wonder what we should be buying (or making) for our children for Christmas.  May I encourage you with some thoughts about gift-giving, especially regarding our children?

1.  Remember that God made your budget.  To complain is to accuse God.  If you and I can’t afford the latest electronics for our children, it’s not worth crying about.  God is never a debtor;  He gives well, and if He has chosen to limit your budget more severely than those around you, be thankful for what you can do.  Teach your children to be thankful and not to compare themselves with others who have more.  “Let patience have her perfect work.”  God has good reasons for every limitation He places into our lives. 

 


2.  Never, never, never go into debt over Christmas gifts.  Material debt, for non-essentials, is dishonest.  We like to make our friends and children happy at Christmas, but we must be honest about our budgets.   We can say that Christmas isn’t about the toys, but when we borrow from 2014 to pay for them, we reveal our true motives.  How many Christmas gifts have lain unattended in dresser drawers—or even been broken—while weary parents tried to pay for them for six more months?

 

3.  We must never rob God while trying to please our children.  The Bible commands us to be consistent with our tithes (10% of our gross income given to God’s work) and offerings (extra gifts that we give to missionaries and other notable ministry projects).  It’s easy at Christmas time to “borrow” from those necessities in order to buy our children what everyone else has.  “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”  Matthew 6:33. 

 

4.  Be on guard for the messages of materialism all around us.  I used to wonder why “Thou shalt not covet” was listed among the ten commandments.  It seemed so pale when situated underneath lying, stealing, adultery, and murder! 

 

Do you hear the messages that are played out on commercials?

 

                 “Your family will love you more if you buy this.”

                 “You will always be happy when driving this.” 

                “People will think you are beautiful if you use this.”

                “You will always have friends if you own this.” 

 

How silly we humans are to believe those lies!  But they work:  advertisers spend millions (maybe even billions?) of dollars each year just for the privilege of coming into our living rooms for 30 – 45 seconds and tell us that.  Turn off the commercials (or even the TV entirely!).   Imagine those shiny toys at a Goodwill store next summer.  Because many of them will be—and you can buy it then, for $2.00! 

 

Be careful about buying toys that do all the thinking for your kids—besides the fact that you will be buying batteries every other week, they rob your kids of the ability to make their own fun. 

 

5.  Focus on others.  The greatest joy really is in giving, not receiving.  Last weekend, a friend came to me with an unusual request.  She is going through a terribly deep sorrow right now, and as she handed me an envelope, she said,  “I don’t have much happiness in my life right now.  Just promise me that when you open this, you will smile.  That will make me feel better.”  I am so touched by her perspective.  Our children need to discover the joy of serving and reaching out to others.  Maybe a gift toward relief in the Philippines, or an hour singing carols at the nursing home, will help them to focus on how they can do a small part to relieve some of the enormous suffering in this sad world. 

 

6.  Buy gifts that make your children better people.  Gift-giving is a wonderful opportunity to show love, share your values,  and to help to shape our children’s character.  Since our oldest are turning 17 years old tomorrow and our youngest is just 4, I have a pretty good idea which toys last and which ones break; which ones get used and which ones get played with.  Joshua’s little shelf of toys is made up almost entirely of hand-me-downs from his older siblings.  Here’s what has lasted since 1996:

 

*Building toys:  Waterproof and almost unbreakable (even if Dad steps on one in the middle of the night  . . . the toys are unbreakable; Dad is not! ), you can’t go wrong with Legos (all sizes), wooden blocks, and Lincoln Logs.  I’m seeing K’nex now, and I’m sure they will be on my list soon as well!  We grew up with Tinker Toys too.     

 

*Books.  Not enough can be said for good books in the home.   I won’t make a list (it would be a blog in itself), but be sure to purchase a copy of Honey for a Child’s Heart  by Gladys Hunt for a pretty comprehensive book list and book reviews.  I’ve been known to grab that book and just comb my way through Amazon and eBay for Christmas gifts (often 99 cents plus shipping). 

 

*Hobbies.  Woodcarving sets, tools, sewing machines (maybe the only justification for Black Friday), hunting gear, weight set (again, ours came from a garage sale for $5—don’t break the bank!), camping gear, jump ropes, yo-yo’s,  knitting/crocheting/cross-stitch kits, scrapbooking materials, journals and pens, sports balls, sleds (if you live near snow), music books, sketch pads and pencils, paint sets, kitchen items, etc.   Last year, we used some of Joshua’s Christmas money toward wood, and his brother helped Dad to build him a little sandbox under the tree outside.   Don’t be afraid to buy discounted items.  All of our roller-blades come from Goodwill or garage sales. 

 

*Imaginative play.  Little people, dolls, cars, trains, army men (yes, the ones who hold guns!), animals and barns, dress up clothes.  My mom once bought a wedding dress for $5.00 at a garage sale.  Most.Favorite.Toy.Ever. among the little girl cousins in this family!  My favorite home video is of Kaitlyn (age 9) racing across the lawn in that wedding dress, chasing Louie, her cousin’s dog. 

 

*Board games.  Not “bored games,” but get the ones that are really fun!  Monopoly, Uno, Battleship, Stratego, Dominos, mancala, Settlers, Sorry!, Candyland, Skip-bo.  We learned Dutch Blitz from a missionary to England, and we got hooked.   Puzzles are a fun family project too. 

 

*Educational and spiritual DVD’s and CD’s, science projects (Hobby Lobby will get your imagination going). 

 

*Spiritual growth.  A new Bible, a devotional journal, a book about the Christian life. 

 

*Yourself.  What do you do well?  My mother-in-law once sewed the twins each their own apron and gave them a package of muffin mix.  They had so much fun cooking for us that night!  Memories last longer than toys.  And of course we still have those precious little aprons! 

 

*Practical.  Curling irons, stockings full of deodorant (especially if you have a seventh-grader around), underwear (why buy it in January when you can call it a “gift”?), anything they have been borrowing from you lately. J    

 

Merry Christmas! 

 

“We love Him because He first loved us.”  What a gift!  What a Savior!  We have so much to celebrate. 

 

 

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