What Jesus Can Do

(I appreciate my husband Jason showing me this truth from Scripture--)

Homosexuality is not a new sin, and the reaction we are seeing is not new either. In Genesis 19 is the story of Lot, an unprofitable believer, trying to keep the homosexuals of his city from assaulting his guests (angels in disguise). In verse 7, Lot weakly appeals to the homosexuals as friends and says, "I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly." In verse 9, here is their response: "This one fellow (Lot) came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them." In other words--"You are judging us, and now we will be harsher with you than what we had intended for your guests." Sound familiar?

While there is no place for ridicule, name-calling, self-righteousness, or bullying toward any sinner, we do well to instruct ourselves from the Bible rather than from a politically-correct culture that has long despised the convicting power of Scripture. "The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul." (Psalm 19:7) The same Bible that teaches that God loves sinners teaches us what a sinner is. To skip over the bad news is to nullify the good news.

This Christmas, let us not forget what the name Jesus means, as His coming was told to Joseph: "And thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins." (Matthew 1:21)

The power of the blood of Christ is not just about getting us into heaven "someday," but also in delivering us today from the power of sin in our lives. And so, from one sinner to another--Jesus loves you. He came to save you from your sins. What a Savior!

Six Parenting Traps to Avoid

My brothers like to reminisce about the time they fooled me into running out into our garden to “see something, quick!”  They both stood excitedly in the soft, spring dirt, waving their hands and shouting.  I ran out to see “it,” and promptly fell into a hole they had dug and disguised under straw.  Having had to endure my bossiness and my many hours in front of the mirror each day (trying to figure out how to use a curling iron), they had appointed themselves my “Ministers of Humility.”  And that day, they were profoundly rewarded. 

Satan has laid traps for us as well.  (Please ignore the metaphor here that compares my brothers to “Satan.”  They really are wonderful people!).   Of course, there are more than six traps, but here are six that I can relate to because I’ve done or been tempted to do all of them.  Maybe you have too.  Let’s talk about these pitfalls, with the hope of avoiding them next time Satan waves his hands and draws us toward them. 

 

1.  Not aiming for the heart.  Solomon, in his earlier (and wiser) years, implored, “My son, give me thine heart.”  (Proverbs 23:26)  Those of us with strong personalities can drag good behavior out of anyone, through intimidation and filibuster.  But that is no guarantee we have our children’s hearts.  One very quick and easy test is this:  “What do my children do when I’m not around?”  Selective obedience is a tell-tale sign that our children are simply enduring a set of rules, which will be abandoned as soon as they “get out” (or even before).   Poor attitudes, provocative  Facebook posts and “selfies”, lack of communication with authority, rebellious friends, a curiosity toward the world and a lack of interest in the Lord, inappropriate music, photos, or videos on their phones, and a muted desire to be around family all point to a heart that has strayed.   Parents who think they can “force” that heart back will be frustrated.   Hearts must be drawn, not dragged.  And of course, our primary mission is to make sure that Jesus has our children’s hearts in the first place, through the salvation that He gives and the power of His Holy Spirit throughout their Christian life.  We do well to pray that God will use anything or anyone to allow our kids will get caught when they are getting involved with secret sin.  Sure, it’s embarrassing, and comes with high consequences the older they get.  But what’s your goal?    

 

2.  Financing things we don’t believe in.  Otherwise known as “enablement,” this practice has deadly consequences spiritually.  Jesus said, “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”  (Matthew 6:21)  Parents who believe in godly living do themselves and great disservice to hand out spending money to kids who promptly buy inappropriate CD’s, revealing clothes, and concert tickets to groups mom and dad do not endorse.  At our church, we have a benevolent fund.  When people call for assistance, we are sometimes able to purchase groceries for them, fill a prescription, or put some gas into their car.  But we never, ever hand them cash.  We have a responsibility to make sure that our benevolent fund is financing formula and heart medicine, not weed and whiskey.  If you cannot control what your children buy or trust them to make wise choices (“He buys his video games from his friends at school!”), then stop the cash flow.   For teenagers who have jobs, call a “spending freeze” and send those paychecks to the bank (they have camp to pay for next summer, right?).   

 

3.  Not understanding those “devices.”  I hate to admit it, but it was my son who first informed me that his ipod had a parental control feature on it.  When it came to researching ahead of time—Epic. Fail. on my part, for not using Google.   Thankfully, Jonathan helped me out on that one.  We owe it to our children to know everything their devices are capable of doing.  We can’t say it loudly enough, but let’s try:  USE FILTERS.  Every internet-capable device in our homes—smart phones, ipods, ipads, you-name-it, should have an internet filter.  It’s good for Mom and Dad, too.  Safe Eyes is just one of many filters, but we are thankful for friends who tipped us off to this good program.  We receive a Weekly Usage Summary on each user, including data that shows any attempts to enter forbidden sites.   This is not because I don’t trust my kids; it’s because I don’t trust the devil.  He hates my kids.  Remember:  The devil is a fool, but he’s not an idiot.  He knows our weaknesses even more than we do, and the Bible says he prowls around, “seeking whom he may devour.” (I Peter 5:8)  Our only safety is to walk with Someone wiser than all of us:    “Greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world.”  (I John 4:4)

 

4.  Failing to enjoy the treasure of children.  Life is busy, and we’re going to be late—Get your shoes on and meet me in the car.  Put that down—we’ve got to go!  And life spins us along, like a soccer ball, until we suddenly look back and realize our kids are almost grown up.  I have a memory—It should be a good memory, but instead it’s a convicting one.   I was running late to choir practice on Sunday night.  I had Kaitlyn swinging along in her car set, with an over-stuffed diaper bag slung over my shoulder and the twins each held at the wrist as we flew across the parking lot.  Suddenly, Jonathan bent over to examine a small piece of gravel in the parking lot.  I didn’t have time that evening for gravel, but before I could finish my lecture and yank him along—a lady came up behind us and sweetly said to Jonathan, “Did you find a pretty rock?”  Right there in the middle of the parking lot, she bent down to study it with him.  I was hostage to their science lesson, and since I couldn’t lecture her, I stood there awkwardly, watching her do what I should have had time to do myself:  Enjoy life with my son.  She wasn’t seeking to preach to me that day, but her sermon was not soon forgotten.   Slow down.  Our kids are attracted to people who like to be with them.  Either I can make it clear that I cherish my children and enjoy them—laughing at their goofy stories  and appreciating their talents, choosing to be with them in my free time—or I may find myself replaced by someone who can appreciate them more. 

 

5.  Preaching sermons we don’t believe or understand.   We discredit ourselves when we dive into topics we have not studied out.  II Timothy 2:15 is not a command to “read” the Bible; it’s a command to “study.”  Our children have special radar that enables them to detect when we are simply parroting a sermon we heard on the radio or a warning we read in an article, rather than prayerfully developing genuine convictions.  Be real.  “Easy come, easy go” standards, that constantly get tweaked because we don’t have solid convictions to stand on, produce rebellion.  Eventually, our kids quit listening.   I remember a man who loudly denounced a violent video game-- later purchasing that same game for his son!   I agree with his original sermon (we don’t do Grand Theft Auto here either), and  his severe shift to the wrong side of that issue  did more damage than just in the video game arena.  His son is learning not to place much stock in “early polling.”  Dad will cave eventually.   We have to do our own homework before we preach the sermon, and then stick by our well-proved convictions. 

 

6.  Selfish parenting.  Ugh.  I’m not proud of the time I made some clothes for Jessica that were just ugly.  She balked at wearing them (I’m not exactly a tailor), and I tried making her guilty for not “appreciating all that work!” She reluctantly wore them, out of obedience, but it was clearly under duress!  She’s been sweet to accept my apology and laugh about that these years later, but it wasn’t very funny at the time.  When we impose burdens on our children simply to satisfy our own selfishness, we display immaturity and—even worse—we train our children to live with false guilt.  Is it really a sin to dislike clothes that are universally perceived as “ugly”, just because we are proud of our masterpiece?  What about making a child feel guilty for losing a baseball game-- or mispronouncing a word or not being popular or not having a boyfriend or being overweight or not being musically inclined or stuttering? Even openly criticizing or mocking others outside of the family for their physical anomalies and mistakes communicates to our children, “You’d better not do that either!”  The trouble with selfish parenting is that those children eventually learn how to ignore guilt—which is not a skill we want our kids to be good at!  They need to learn to resolve genuine guilt (the kind that is always the result of actual sin, not just feeling inadequate because we failed to please others), through repentance and confession of sin (Proverbs 28:13).  False guilt over natural human behavior is nasty stuff because it sets our kids up to quench the Holy Spirit in the areas that really matter. 

 

We’re all students.  May the Holy Spirit be our teacher, not the world! 

"Let another man praise thee..."

Proverbs 27:2, "Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth . . ."

Bragging. It's like body odor--It always seems to smell worse on others than on ourselves. Why do we love to brag? Why do we promote ourselves, generously patting ourselves on the back and sharing stories that always place us in the best light (even at the expense of others)? Some brief thoughts on boastfulness, and... what it really tells about each of us:

1. Bragging ignores the Source of my gifts.

James Small wrote the poetry for the hymn, "I've Found a Friend, Oh, Such a Friend." His second stanza contains this compelling thought: "Naught that I have mine own I call, I hold it for the Giver. My heart, my strength, my life, my all are His, and His forever." Whatever thing we hold precious about ourselves that prompts us to brag--our abilities, intelligence, appearance, heritage--is merely a borrowed resource, with the intent of honoring God. Like a toddler who proudly carries his daddy's drill, we sometimes think that these borrowed tools have the effect of making us more important. We are wrong. Someday, God will likely ask for many of those resources back. And when our minds are declining, and our hands no longer can produce music at the piano, we will be startled by the fleeting nature of earthly gifts.

2. Bragging places trust in human device. Amazingly, it's not humility that is opposite of pride; it's FAITH. Note the structure of Proverbs 28:25, "He that is of a proud heart stirreth up strife: but he that putteth his trust in the Lord shall be made fat." Do you see how the sentence acts like a weighted scale? On one side we have pride, and on the other side we have trust (faith) in the Lord. Faith really IS the victory over every sin we face, including pride. Humility is a by-product of faith in the Lord. Pride is trusting in self, and bragging is the fruit of that misplaced trust. And as is so often the case, "The bigger the mouth, the smaller the man." Give God all the glory for your successes, and you'll never be accused of exaggeration.

3. Bragging tramples on the needs of those around me. Philippians 2:4 says, "Look not every man on his own things, but every man on the things of others." Our focus is not on how we can take care of ourselves, but always on those around us and on their needs. Whatever abilities and gifts God has lent us are for His will and to serve others, not to claim the glory for ourselves. Competing for attention by matching boast for boast ("Your team won by 35 points? Well, we once won a basketball game by 55!") does not humble the other person; it merely ignites their sinful desire to prove themselves even more. Usually it's our own pride that reacts to the pride in others and wants to fill the position of "humbling" them. We are pretty wretched creatures, without the help of the Holy Spirit to change us and control us! First Corinthians 13:4 - 5 remind us that "Charity . . . is not puffed up . . . seeketh not her own."

4. Bragging robs me of God's rewards for me. When the disciples grew frustrated with the Pharisees, who exalted themselves in the streets with costly robes and Old Testament Scripture verses plastered to their foreheads, noses in the air and self-righteousness emanating from their loud, lengthy, fleshly prayers, Jesus simply said, "They have their reward." We serve a Christ Who commanded us to pray in closets, figuratively reminding us to seek a higher reward than the praise of man. So pity the bragger. He has his reward.

Deer Hunting

So . . . Deer hunting has not been what we had hoped this year. (In other words, no deer.) I'm not sure why no deer (experts can enlighten us on what we're doing wrong), but today it didn't matter. Here's why: Jason has been sitting out in the woods every free morning since October, either with David (bow hunting) or the twins (gun). Since he rises early for his bus job, as well as on Sundays... for preaching, I doubt that he has slept in past 4:30 AM more than once or twice in about 8 weeks.

Last week, after another unsuccessful hunt, Jonathan came home and said, "Next Saturday, I'm taking David hunting so Dad can sleep in." And he did. This morning as I dropped them off at our hunting spot at 5:00 AM, and watched Jonathan help David get his gear into the woods and navigate past the electric fence (on the farm where they have permission to hunt), it suddenly wasn't about deer any more. I was thankful for Jonathan sacrificing an early Saturday morning (and most of the day) for his brother and his dad, and I was thankful for the responsibility that Jason has taught both of the boys. I was nothing but a chauffeur and a bystander, as they collected all their gear and trekked out there in the dark, reminding each other of what they needed for their hours in the deer blind. As I watched them walk together into the darkness, I realized that the deer is just an accessory. I already had the real reward.